{"id":286,"date":"2017-02-21T16:56:30","date_gmt":"2017-02-21T16:56:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/?p=286"},"modified":"2017-02-21T16:56:30","modified_gmt":"2017-02-21T16:56:30","slug":"story-of-the-month-the-ice-cream-cake","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/?p=286","title":{"rendered":"Story of the Month: The Ice Cream Cake"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>Inside a confectioner\u2019s shop on Christmas Eve.\u00a0 Carol and Ron, wearing overcoats and hats, standing before a freezer, peering at ice cream cakes.<\/p>\n

RON:\u00a0 What about that one?<\/p>\n

CAROL:\u00a0 That\u2019s for a baby shower.\u00a0 See the plastic booties?\u00a0 I don\u2019t want booties\u00a0on my birthday cake.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 But it\u2019s His birthday, too.\u00a0 Booties might be a nice touch, a gently\u00a0irreverent\u00a0reverence.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 Tomorrow.\u00a0 He gets to have tomorrow.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Who ever heard of ice cream cake in December anyway?<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 This is my first birthday at home in five years, and everyone expects two ice cream cakes from Bischoff\u2019s like we had every Christmas Eve my entire life.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Two cakes?\u00a0 Christ, we\u2019ll never get out of here.\u00a0 Why do you need two?<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 We always—<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Okay, okay.\u00a0 Let\u2019s just get on with it.\u00a0 The snow\u2019s coming down harder.\u00a0 We don\u2019t want to get stuck.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 We won\u2019t get stuck.<\/p>\n

R: (theatrically)<\/p>\n

Christmas Eve in Bischoff\u2019s.\u00a0 The other customers have chosen their cakes and left.\u00a0 The power goes out.\u00a0 Melting ice cream oozes from the freezers.\u00a0 It\u2019s reached their knees, their waists!\u00a0 The door\u2019s blocked by snowdrifts.\u00a0 The hot fudge machine gurgles ominously.\u00a0 Scalding chocolate heaves like lava.\u00a0 Carol and Ron and old man Bischoff leap onto a tabletop, calling out for mercy.\u00a0 But who\u2019s to hear?\u00a0 Everyone\u2019s snug at home eating figgy pudding and knitting booties for baby Jesus.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 Shhh!\u00a0 I can\u2019t think.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 There aren\u2019t that many cakes to choose from.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 Because we got here too late.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Don\u2019t look at me like that.\u00a0 If you hadn\u2019t hidden my manger set at the back of the closet—<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 Hidden it?\u00a0 That\u2019s where I put stuff we never use.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Who thinks to look for a manger set inside a fondue pot at the bottom of a box labelled snorkeling gear?<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 Weren\u2019t there masks and flippers in there?<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 You must have put the flippers away wet.\u00a0 One of the camels from the manger has mold.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 It\u2019ll rub off.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 I already tried.\u00a0 I broke off one of the humps.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 So now you have a dromedary.\u00a0 Big deal.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 It is<\/i> a big deal.\u00a0 I\u2019ve had that manger since I was nine years old.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 You never took it out other Christmases.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 We never had a tree.\u00a0 Where was I supposed to put it, on top of the toilet tank?<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 You never said you wanted a tree.\u00a0 Poinsettias are more sophisticated, you said.\u00a0 Let\u2019s fill the apartment with poinsettias, you said.\u00a0 I thought you\u2019d pee yourself last year when we found those pink ones.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Besides, every Christmas morning the past five years, we\u2019ve taken off for the \u00a0 Caribbean — was I supposed to pack up the shepherds and the sheep and the wise men and everybody, and set them up in the sand underneath some\u00a0 coconut palm?<\/p>\n

C: (placating)\u00a0 Look, we can get a tree next year.\u00a0 And this year, we\u2019ll have my parents\u2019 tree.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Which is why I needed to find the manger.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 Which you did.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 My back\u2019s still aching from having to lift that rowing machine out of the way.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 Can we not get into your back problems right now?\u00a0 Can we concentrate on the cakes?<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 All right, all right.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 (beat)\u00a0 But I do want to hear about your manger scene and why you—<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Yes?<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 Later.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Of course.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 I mean, it\u2019s not like you ever explained to me before about…<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 No.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 And we really do need to get these cakes and get going.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Yes.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 (beat)\u00a0 So, have you been hating our Christmases all these years?<\/p>\n

R: \u00a0 No, no.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 (mournful)\u00a0 You have.\u00a0 I can hear it in your voice.\u00a0 Oh, Ron.\u00a0 It\u2019s my birthday, and now you\u2019re telling me that all these years, you\u2019ve been pretending—<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 No, no.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 And I did put those flippers away wet.\u00a0 The mold on the camel is all my fault.<\/p>\n

R: \u00a0 No.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 (starts out teary, slowly shifts to anger)<\/p>\n

You were this little boy with a manger scene and it was special to you, and I never knew, and I thought I <\/i>was special to you…\u00a0 (beat)\u00a0 Who was that little boy, Ron?\u00a0 And how come you never told me about him, about yourself and that you wanted a Christmas tree so you could put out your manger scene — your extra special, god-damned extra secret manger scene?<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Well, I…<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 And what else aren\u2019t you telling me? \u00a0 What other parts of our lives do you think are shallow and silly and…and…\u201cirreverent?\u201d<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Whoa!<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 It\u2019s Christmas Eve and it\u2019s my birthday and I want to know!<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 In Bischoff\u2019s?<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 In Bischoff\u2019s!<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Where we\u2019re picking out your birthday cake?\u00a0 Oh, correction: birthday cakes<\/i>.\u00a0 Plural.\u00a0 That must<\/i> be bought here<\/i> and nowhere else.\u00a0 That mustn\u2019t have booties on them.\u00a0 That must be Christmas-y, but not too much.\u00a0 That must exactly match some cobwebby, no doubt inaccurate childhood memory newly festooned with guilt — a memory that you have never bothered to share with me<\/i>.\u00a0 Not that I\u2019m offended.\u00a0 Because I am secure enough in your love not to be offended by that!<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 Don\u2019t you dare take the high road!\u00a0 I\u2019m secure in your love, too!<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 (deflated)\u00a0 Well, then.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 (deflated)\u00a0 Well.\u00a0 Then.<\/p>\n

R: (pointing to a cake)\u00a0 What if we took the booties off?<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 (working to regain composure)\u00a0 It is<\/i> a pretty cake.\u00a0 And for the other…\u00a0 How about that one?<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Kind of plain.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 It\u2019s chocolate.\u00a0 (beat)\u00a0 Chocolate is<\/i> really your favorite, isn\u2019t it?<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 Please, Carol, yes.\u00a0 But don\u2019t you want something that looks more festive?\u00a0 More seasonal?<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 We could put one of your camels on it.\u00a0 (beat)\u00a0 Couldn\u2019t we?<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 What would your family think?<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 What they think anyway — that we\u2019re weirdos, especially about Christmas.<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 The dromedary.<\/p>\n

C:\u00a0 Huh?<\/p>\n

R:\u00a0 I think I can spare the dromedary.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

“The Ice Cream Cake” was published in the anthology\u00a0Real Women Write<\/em><\/em>, Austin, Texas, 2017.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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