{"id":515,"date":"2018-11-15T17:48:56","date_gmt":"2018-11-15T17:48:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/?p=515"},"modified":"2018-11-15T17:56:12","modified_gmt":"2018-11-15T17:56:12","slug":"story-of-the-month-the-birdhouse","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/?p=515","title":{"rendered":"Story of the Month: The Birdhouse"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>Setting: A home woodworking shop in the basement of a suburban house.<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>I\u2019m not going.<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN: What do you mean, you\u2019re not going?\u00a0 <\/span>I\u2019m finished.\u00a0 <\/span><\/span>You\u2019re<\/span><\/span> finished.\u00a0 <\/span>You\u2019re going.<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>I\u2019m not going.<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN:\u00a0 <\/span>What the hell good do you think you are to me sitting here?\u00a0 <\/span>In case you haven\u2019t noticed, there\u2019s no birds in here.\u00a0 <\/span>They\u2019re all outside.<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>You could get a canary.<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN:\u00a0 <\/span>You were built for bluebirds.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>I hear canaries are quite nice.\u00a0 <\/span>Singing in coal mines.\u00a0 <\/span>Very self-<\/span>sacrificing.\u00a0 <\/span>You could take a lesson.<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN: \u00a0 <\/span>Look, I made you, and I decide what\u2019s what around here, and I say you\u2019re goin\u2019 out into the yard and bring me some bluebirds!\u00a0 <\/span>And I want them reliable, too — back every year.<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>I won\u2019t do it.<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN: \u00a0 <\/span>You got no say.<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>If you put me out there, I swear I\u2019ll make life miserable for any bird\u00a0<\/span>comes near me.\u00a0 <\/span>Catch at their feet and break their spindly little legs, let in the rain to rot their nests, roll their eggs out onto the hard dirt.<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN:\u00a0 <\/span>What kind of way is that to talk?\u00a0 <\/span>Bluebirds are very particular, you know.\u00a0 <\/span>Won\u2019t take just any old house slapped together any old way.\u00a0 <\/span>Have some pride in your calling, show some self-respect.<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE (coquettish):\u00a0 <\/span>I <\/span>am<\/span> rather neatly turned out, aren\u2019t I?<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN (stroking roof of birdhouse):\u00a0 <\/span>Would I put my name to something that wasn\u2019t?<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE (coyly): Your name?\u00a0 <\/span>You haven\u2019t put your name on me.<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN:\u00a0 <\/span>No?!\u00a0 <\/span>An oversight.\u00a0 <\/span>Let\u2019s turn you around here.\u00a0 <\/span>That\u2019s it.\u00a0 <\/span>Now, I\u2019m just going to lift one corner, if you wouldn\u2019t mind.\u00a0 <\/span>I have my wood burner right here.<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>That tickles! \u00a0 \u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

MAN:\u00a0 <\/span>So, now you\u2019re all set.<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>You made other birdhouses before me, didn\u2019t you?\u00a0 <\/span>(beat)\u00a0 <\/span>You don\u2019t have to answer that.\u00a0 <\/span>Of course you have.\u00a0 <\/span>I can tell.<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN:\u00a0 <\/span>Never one like you. <\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>Never?<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN (shaking his head no):\u00a0 <\/span>I was afraid to try.\u00a0 <\/span>I thought I wasn\u2019t good enough, didn\u2019t have the right tools.\u00a0 <\/span>Like I told you, bluebirds are fussy.<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>Well, the nerve of them!<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN:\u00a0 <\/span>But I can\u2019t imagine a bluebird passing <\/span>you<\/span><\/span> by.<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>Really?\u00a0 <\/span>I bet you say that to all your woodworking projects.<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN:\u00a0 <\/span>No, honestly, I don\u2019t.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>Well, I suppose after you\u2019ve taken such trouble, I ought at least to try.<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN:\u00a0 <\/span>It\u2019d mean a lot to me.\u00a0 <\/span>I don\u2019t have that many seasons left, you know, to\u00a0<\/span>have bluebirds in my yard.<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>Let\u2019s go, then, before I lose my nerve.<\/span><\/p>\n

(MAN picks up the birdhouse, carries it to the outside door, opens the door, and stands on the threshold.)
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN (pointing): That\u2019s your mounting pole at the edge of the lawn.\u00a0 <\/span>I greased it to protect against raccoons and mice.\u00a0 <\/span>And ants.\u00a0 <\/span>Ants can eat baby birds.<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>It\u2019s awfully big out there, isn\u2019t it?<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN: Bluebirds like open space.\u00a0 <\/span>But the trees are near enough that the fledglings have a place to land when they\u2019re learning to fly.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE: I didn\u2019t think it would be so big out there.<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN: Well, listen…\u00a0 <\/span>How about…?\u00a0 <\/span>Look, come autumn — when the birds leave — I\u2019ll bring you back inside.\u00a0 <\/span>How would that be?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 <\/span>You won\u2019t forget?<\/span><\/p>\n

MAN:\u00a0 <\/span>I won\u2019t forget.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

(MAN exits with the birdhouse.)<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Setting: A home woodworking shop in the basement of a suburban house. BIRDHOUSE:\u00a0 I\u2019m not going. MAN: What do you […]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"Layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1,5],"tags":[],"class_list":["entry","author-noellesickelswp","post-515","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","category-allposts","category-story"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/515","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=515"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/515\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":523,"href":"https:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/515\/revisions\/523"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=515"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=515"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/noellesickels.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=515"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}